Maybe This is Heaven

It's been suggested that Heaven may be located in Iowa.  It's been suggested that Heaven may be, based on picture books, a partly cloudy place.  Some people may try to tell you that there's no such thing as Heaven. I may be one of those people.  It kind of depends on my mood, honestly.

Well I've been to Iowa.  And I know some damn fine Iowans.  But I'm fairly certain it's no paradise.

I'm not one for too much certainty in life so maybe I'm down with the partly cloudy description.  The picture books do seem to suggest it.

And again, I'm not one who's too big on certainty.  I don't really know what's going to happen tomorrow much less in the hereafter.  I very nearly minored in theology in college and really all that taught me was that religion is messed up.  If there is a god - that's one seriously confused supreme being we've got ourselves.  That or one incredibly certain supreme being who's just being dick for fun.  Or something else entirely.  I really don't know.  I prefer the confused route.  Anyway...

There's this other thing

I don't often "name" my pictures.  Because that seems too much like thinking they're actual like "art" or something.  It's taking myself entirely too seriously.  I'm not really down with that.  I start... I don't know, it gets weird, I don't like it.

However... If I did name my pictures, I would probably call these "Heaven One through Five"

Because seriously - if I got to pick.  If I were the supreme being (confused, certain and just being a dick for fun, or whatever) and I got to make the call.  This is exactly what it would look like.  Baseball fields with corn in the outfield are nice.  You know I like a catch with my dad.  Gates made of pearl sound really nice too.  Hell, I even like harp music most of the time.  Give me the lake any day of the week.  I'll take it.  That's fuckin Heaven.

Only About 130 Days to Spring Training...

So... gotta tell ya, end of this Twins season just... it just sucked.  It was just terrible.  I mean... ah, God, it just hurts.  Like, really I'm not even actually ready to talk about it yet.

I just... man, I just hate the Yankees so much.  They're just terrible, terrible people.  Ugh.

And seriously?  What the hell?  I have about 17 different rants about umpiring and how, you know, when that's what you do for a living you should probably be, I don't know, competent at it.  But, as is the case with most of my rants, they get kind of out of hand pretty quickly.  I start cursing a lot and telling strangers to put things in places where there isn't much natural lighting and whatnot.  It's a little crazy.  So I'll spare you.

Here - here's a super cool picture of stadium seating.

Gotta love those lines right?  Well, I do anyway.

And here's a super cool picture of Kirby Puckett... sort of.

And a fist pump that every Minnesotan recognizes.  That should have been repeated this year, but whatever.  I'll stop before I start ranting.

And a pair of hands that actually every baseball fan is familiar with (because they happen to be part of the MLB logo) but Twins fans have a special love for.

I just suddenly found myself singing in my head.  "Just like Tooooony, the Killer and Carew."  Weird.

Hey here are some more cool stadium seats.

Ohhhh, negative space.  Neat-o.

So here's one of the most random things I've ever seen at a baseball game... but also, hands down, one of the most utterly fantastic things I've ever seen at a baseball game.  ... In the crowd anyway.

I mean, obviously Santa is a Twins fan.  That goes without saying.  I just didn't know he had season tickets is all.  Let's go in for a close up of what may be the most adorable thing ever in the history of everything. 

Okay so maybe the most adorable thing ever in the history of everything is a little... hyperbolic but still.  I mean, look at that.  that's just... GAW!  That's just a teeny, tiny little hand in a great big ol' glove.  It's just so stinkin' cute.  I think my heart just grew three sizes and broke the little x-ray thingy.

Alright Boys... I'll see you next year.  I believe in you.  2011 is going to be magic, I just know it.  The end there was pretty rough but I ain't mad at ya.  Justin, you get your head all healed up and whatnot and come back.  We like you, we think you're neat, we clearly need someone who'd down with wrestling bears on the field.  DJ Cuddles, that's not a knock on you, pal, I would just really like my first baseman-y first baseman back.  I'd like you to go back to right field, okay?  Cool.  Jim, I'd just like you to come back.  You hit just whole bunches of homers for us this year, but you still have a ways to go before you make up for all the ones you hit against us.  Have a good winter, boys.  We'll see you in the spring!

Merry Postseason To You

Guess where I am, bitches?

I'm sorry that was inappropriate. You're not bitches. I'm just excited because I'm at the baseball game, and it's the last day of September and we've got a hell of a lot of baseball to play yet this year.

It also doesn't hurt that it's 73 degrees out on the last day of September.

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Grrrr, Arg

This is a little something I like to call "Grumpy Cait." It has the sub-title In A Cute Dress, but that's hardly the point. Allow me to illustrate a reason for today's grumpieness: I was briefly happy a few minutes ago when I realized I got to set m alarm more than an hour later than it was this morning. I am currently pleased by the fact that tomorrow I'll wake up shortly before 6 am. Because let me tell you, it sure beats the shit outta waking up shortly before 5 am. That is a time for going to bed, not waking up.

So yeah, that's how my day started, how are you?
In other words, what has two thumbs and a bad temper? This guy (girl). it's 8:30 and I'm going to bed.

I also have a big old rant about the home run derby and/or the All Star Game. I'll have to save that for tomorrow.

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Seriously, I'm Not Kidding

Know how I keep saying I'm a nerd? Not joking around. I seriously am.

You need examples? Fine.

Know what's SUPER HOT (if you're me)?

That man right there.

Okay, sure he's not hard on the eyes. He has very pretty blue eyes and adorable curly blond hair. The smile's pretty swoonworthy and the massive baseball player arms? Not counting against him. Plus who doesn't love a Canadian, right? These are not the parts of Justin Morneau being my baseball boyfriend that make me a nerd. (Those are the parts that make me a chick, for those of you keeping track at home)

The parts that are make me a nerd? Well, to answer that I have to tell you what is seriously the totally hottest part about him right now:

What is super, incredibly hot right now?

a .380 batting average.

a very nearly .500 on base percentage.

a .700 slugging percentage. Which makes:

a 1.199! On base plus slugging.

Not joking - I'm swooning over here.

And it's the stats (okay, the arms a big part too) that are doing it for me.

Nerd.

Alright Fine...

Okay... I admit it. Watching baseball under the sky is going to be pretty cool. This was taken from the upper deck of Target Field. And beautiful clear days like Saturday are going to be lovely.

Of course... if we ever do draw the All Star Game to the Twin Cities, it'll probably snow in July. Because that's just the way it goes...

Puck is my Homeboy

This is a super cool wall in part of one of the fancier areas of Target Field. There were a couple of these throughout the stadium actually, but I'm pretty sure Puck was the first baseball player I was aware of. He was my first baseball boyfriend (the first in a line of really great baseball players). He's Puck. And that's freakin' awesome. I like him being around the new field. You can tell from this photo - but the way it's situated, Puck's smiling AT the field. It's really pretty cool.

Smell Em!

Mmmmm.... smell that? That's eight more years, folks.

Smells goooooood. Also, in case you were wondering, that sound just now? That was the sound of the entirety of Twins Territory letting out the breath they've been holding since October. It's possible we may have affected the Earth's orbit...

(Also, let's hope that guy behind him sticks around too.)

Play Ball!

Through a stroke of very good luck I got the chance to go to the season ticket holder's open house showing off Target Field today. Have to say - they sure are classing up the joint compared to the Dome. Granted that wouldn't have taken too much, but still... there are parts of that park that I would be embarrassed to be in while wearing jeans and Twins tee-shirt. Then again, I'll more than likely never see those parts of the park again, so that works out.

I will admit the site lines in the park look pretty damn good, and sitting in the sunshine on a 35 degree day was actually very pleasant. It was also exceptionally cool to sit in the sun in the new ball park, drink a beer, and watch the last couple innings of the tiebreaker on the jumbotron. I don't know how many games I'll actually get to see this year (what with all the bandwagoneers and all) but I think I'm going to like the ones I do get to see.

I will say though - when it comes to the shade: it's a damn good thing they have those heat lamps in the concourses.

Monday Bonus Post!

As I said - I loves me some baseball. And I live in Minnesota, and Justin Morneau and Matt Guerrier play for Minnesota, so I really loves me some Twins baseball. They're my boys and I love them. And today everybody is all a twitter because there's talks about the Twins courting Jim Thome for next year. I have mixed feelings about this. Most because I really hate Jim Thome. But I'm aware of the fact that that hate is mostly seated in the fact that he has historically hit off the Twins, like, A LOT, and that's very annoying. So mostly I hate him for being a good hitter who doesn't play for the twins. So that helps his odd of me liking him, should he come and play for us. Also I've heard him compared to Corey Koskie more than a couple times as far as clubhouse demeanor and such, so that also bodes well for him.

Still... I can't help but sneer a little bit when I hear his name.

All I can say is this, if he does come to Minnesota

This:

Probably will look a whole lot cuter in this:

Weirder things have happened. I wouldn't have ever guess that I'd be a Joe Crede fan. Yet here I am, incredibly respectful of the Crede power. I swear, that jersey has magic powers.